Matthew Snyder and Matthew Shepard died eight years apart under very different circumstances, both casualties of war. Snyder, a marine, died in Iraq in 2006. He was 20 and heterosexual. Shepard, a civilian, died at 21; the victim of a gay-bashing outside Laramie, Wyoming, inspired by a culture war waged by far right religious and political leaders. Adding insult to the injury of burying a child, the Snyder and Shepard families had to deal with something never witnessed in history before 1991: picketing at their young sons’ funerals by the notorious anti-gay hate preacher, Rev. Fred Phelps….